Segregation

Racial segregation has always been an intense hot topic. It brings up a lot of emotions and years of outcry related to mistreatment. As a result of segregation, there are many programs that tried to address that  humans are individuals and diversity is a good thing. We have a rich society when we can include all races and cultural backgrounds in a community. In some areas, this has been successful, in other areas not so successful.

Tolerance is the ability for people to accept differences.

When I was getting my teaching credential, I took a class called Equity and Diversity. There were specific cultural and racial communities we would cover in the class.  Me being Caucasian of a mixture of European decent, there was not a category covered with my ancestry. In fact, in some cases those with white European decent are sometimes resented. The instructor for this course was Hispanic. Each week we had an assignment on various questions related to how we have been treated through our lives and how people perceived us related to our ethnic identity.  The questions were designed for people to share their experiences in being segregated or discriminated. As the teacher read my answers to the homework assignment, a month into the class, she came up to me and said, "you really have experienced discrimination." When I first came to class, she saw me as a white female. How could I ever understand segregation and discrimination because I was white? Perhaps I could be discriminated against for being female, but that isn't like the extreme segregation or demeaning acts that many of those who are of culture or of a different race face constantly. The teacher realized that the disabled also face segregation and discrimination. That we are challenged of our intelligence, and how we fit and function in society. When someone can't function like most people, like not hear as well, not see, not walk or have other physical challenges, the judgement can interfere with blending normally in society.

This teacher learned that there is another group that experiences discrimination. Another group that goes through the hardships, and the judgements that put barriers in the way of their success to move forward. The perception of the disabled is filled with assumptions, that people have no idea what it really means to have a disability. That we are protected by law, and the perception that there are several programs for the disabled, but yet, in real life, people keep their distance physically and socially. The disabled are still discriminated against, attitudes still exist and even resentment.

How do you explain segregation as far as trying to be treated normally and when you are not treated equal? Segregation is a separation of you and the rest of the world. You do not have access to the norm of society.

Some major movements in the educational system has been inclusion of students. If they have a disability, they must by law be included with the rest of the students. Segregating disabled students is not preferable anymore and the push to integrate a disabled child in regular public school is now mandatory. I was segregated in school as a child. I went to an elementary school for the blind. I found them easy to communicate and mingle, but once I was included in regular public school, I had huge challenges. It is a toss up, what was better? To always be around disabled kids or mixing with non-disabled kids? I grew up not liking "normal" kids. It was that constant battle of not fitting in. It just seemed no matter how I communicated, it was always wrong. I couldn't fit in. I felt segregated, no matter how hard I tried. It always seemed I was patronized, never taken seriously and never feeling that I was highly intelligent. I was the dummy kid in school. My grades reflected it too. 2.3 GPA when I graduated from high school. 

I was the freak, I was teased, put down, laughed at if I tried something. In an audition for a play, I got smirks and laughter throughout my audition. When I wore my uniform for Tall Flags (like drill team) I would get barked at by guys. Told how ugly I looked. This was common throughout middle and high school. Kids would sing to me "retarded."  So even though I was included in the regular public school system, I felt more segregated than being with my blind peers. Its a catch 22, I deserve normal development and being infiltrated with the mass of kids, but yet the "normal" kids were pretty cruel to me.

I did have one friend in high school. It was really nice to have her, but I always still felt insecure that maybe I was company and not a friend. But she did want to take classes with me and we ate lunch together. Maybe I was just too skeptical of those who were not disabled since I had been around more disabled kids than "normal" kids.

Segregation happens at any age. Even in the workplace. You would think that people have grown up as adults, but yet, they are judgemental because you don't fit the mold of, "normal."

Did I need early training in how to handle this? Early training in helping me know how to exchange and communicate more effectively. Being with a hearing and vision loss, I do miss communication cues, what is chic and what is considered a freak or geek. I was the freak in high school and although many people were nice to me, it was still distant. I wasn't the first for people to think to have me come to their house, go to a movie or just hang.

One person I thought was a friend, I realized later in life was just doing her Christian duty to be nice to me. I didn't see the signs when I was younger, but now as an adult I can look back and she just tolerated me. Of course, She was a beauty pageant contestant. I was the ugly dork. Not that is my self esteem coming out, but how people really did look at me. There are two ways to look at this, I thought I was cool, but then there is also how people treat you. You can't change other people, but we still need to not feel segregated either.

I often wondered why did people push away from me? My funny shaped body? Me being slightly geeky looking? Not looking like a complete feminine girl? The way I talk? The way I communicate? All these years I still do not know. But when I was a park ranger, it seemed that melted away. One or two people would be looking at me like I was weird, but most other people listened to me talk. I got such positive feedback and vibes from people all those horrible years of feeling rejected by society in general melted away.

Segregation is a dirty word. It's like I scream, "Why do you treat me like a freak! Leave me alone to cry"

When operant conditioning trainers who focus on positive reinforcement, I so much hate it when they use ignoring tactics on people. Karen Pryor popularized this concept in her book, "Don't Shoot the Dog." I think it is cruel and a power that people need to be extremely careful in using. I also think it is mean when people  ignore so they can control you. I realize we all have annoying behaviors we do, but is this intolerance, so the person uses the power to ignore behavior to change them? How arrogant? Lack of understanding is where the person is coming from and down right rude. I know it touches a huge segregation and ostracization button with me. I do not support this practice at all. It takes a very skilled person to know how to handle the behaviors they do not like and cherish what the person is, instead of focus on what they are doing wrong so you can ignore them. I think this is a form of being a bully and passively aggressively controlling people. There are better kinder ways to change people's behaviors that are good for the person and not ostracizing them. I say let's be compassionate and work with people, instead of trying to be intolerant.

How do we teach tolerance? How do we teach people acceptance? How do we pulverize segregation? My past three years I have been so in pain and hurt. I lost my kindness and who I am. People around me seeing the negative in me and not seeing my beauty. I feel that I have been stomped on my ostracization, stomped on my misunderstandings and no openness to hear me. I am an open person, but no one is seeing me and understanding me. They a re too busy standing their ground. Another form of segregation. I need to be a park ranger again when I felt so accepted. I didn't feel ostracized or segregated. Life wasn't perfect in this environment. Some co-workers did patronize me, looked down to me, didn't think I had intelligent thought, I was ostracized and segregated from the group, but at a much lower incident. So I don't expect a perfect unsegregated world. I just need enough to keep going. I think that's what most people need. Lots of cold people in the world. You are different, they segregate you.