We are certainly social creatures, but we also have to stand with confidence to make our own mind. Take what people say as information to add to your decision, not to be fact to judge another person.
Years ago, I wanted to meet Rocky because he was liked by so many others. I like meeting new people. I was at the Foundation for the Junior Blind's youth center in Los Angeles. From a distance I saw Rocky and thought this would be an opportunity to meet someone I've heard so much about. Me being a social butterfly, I got up and was going to go over to introduce myself, but my friend stopped me. She said he was rude to her and she felt he was a mean person. I stopped and went "oh." I was either 12 or 13 at the time and I didn't go forward, but took my friends word. Now I regret not going over to meet Rocky. Shortly after this incident, Rocky passed away in 1978 and I never got to meet him.
A few years later they made a movie of Rocky's story with Cher playing the mother, Eric Stoltz playing Rockey and Sam Elliot playing the motorcycle boyfriend to Rocky's mother. The movie came out in the mid-80's. I actually was on the set for the movie, and at meal times got to meet Sam Elliot and Eric Stoltz. Cher is shy, but did get to walk right past her in her red curly hair. During the filing, I mostly was in the background during the Camp Bloomfield scenes.
Rocky had a condition called craniodiaphyseal dysplasia, same as what the Elephant Man had. It is excessive growth of the skull causing gross disfiguration of the head. From the movie, my friend and I discovered that Rocky had many severe headaches from his skull growing and moving. Then my friend realized the reason he probably was mean to her. His head was really hurting. My friend explained that he said something to her like, "Get out of here kid!" while holding his head in his hands. My friend took offense, but didn't realize Rocky was in severe pain at that moment.
We must not make judgements of a situation as it may not be what we think. I missed out on meeting someone because I didn't realize that I can make my own judgements and own decisions. A lesson learned at age twelve or thirteen. This scene has been carried with me through my life. Others can have their own opinion and I will listen, but sometimes they may not have all the pieces or the facts about that person. I'm the type of person who likes to connect to people. I like to learn about people. I missed my chance with Rocky.
I can relate to this experience as many people make quick judgements about me. That I hear better than I lead on, or many other things. I've worked hard over the years to have an open mind and learn the person. I do not like being judged so incorrectly, I will work hard not to judge others. You never know when you might miss a chance of meeting someone extroardinary due to judgement getting in the way.